The problem is Snooki. And Brandi Glanville. And teen moms. Because they have a recognizable name, they end up on the Best Seller List. Neat! Meanwhile, I send "charming" emails to major publications begging to be featured. And am usually ignored.
Ok. Done with that.
Earlier this year, I saw a review in my favorite magazine, Bust, for a book called Screw Everyone: Sleeping My Way To Monogamy by Ophira Eisenberg. Immediately bought it, read it, loved it and then tweeted her like a fangirl. She's not your average first time author. She's an NPR podcast hostess. She's a stand up comedienne who's been on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. She's a big deal.
Well, she tweeted me back. Then she bought my book. We exchanged emails. Wait...were we becoming...friends? I decided to test this hypothesis.
"If you're ever in Chicago, maybe we could do a reading together," I wrote.
"Yes, that would be fun!" she wrote.
I must say, this felt a little like that thing I mentioned at the beginning of the August Resolution. "We should totally get together!" Inside the head: we will not get together.
Shortly after this, I read that her book was being adapted for film. Well, it was fun while it lasted, I thought. (I felt the same way after getting to hang out with Rachael Harris during a commercial shoot for Quaker Rice Snacks. We exchanged emails, I sent her a Christmas card, and in the grandest of gestures, I sent her t-shirt from the World's Largest Truckstop. Eventually, our relationship fizzled. Hm...was it the tee?)
I was wrong. Ophira didn't fizzle.
And now I have a reading/wine tasting event scheduled with her in Chicago/Evanston.
Please come. I need her to think I'm as cool as I try to be on the interwebs. Also, invite friends. I'll even extend August's resolution so you get credit. More info here.